Thursday, March 31, 2011

Note to Mekenze

Dear Mekenze,
This is me writing to inform you of something you already know.
I am fascinated with different lifestyle choices that people make. I have been thinking a lot about the optimum way that I should live my life and what I should focus on to make sure that I don't have any regrets and so that I make a contribution to the world. I used to think that I wanted fame and fortune. I am not throwing that option away but I have been putting an enormous amount of pressure on myself.... "I need to make it to Hollywood for people to think I'm important." ..."I need to be on Broadway to be fulfilled.""I am going to disappoint so many people if I don't make it big." .. and many other beliefs that swim through my head every minute of every day.  
Let me tell you how I feel now...
While I am still a Huge Dreamer and I most definitely have a passion for performing and music and dance and theater and acting and everything that goes with it......that is not the only thing that makes me happy.
This is honestly frightening for me to admit... but I really feel strongly about what I have been feeling and I NEED to take this pressure off of myself!
 So here it goes...
My #1 Dream is to be happy. That's the dream! Simple as that!  I know that sounds so dramatic and lame and whatever. but its really how i FEEL. I don't need to be living the fast life to be successful and I feel like I have built up soo many expectations for myself that aren't necessarily my greatest passions....
I don't want to miss out on the "normal" things.. 
I want to be a mother and raise a family more than anything. I want to learn how to cook delicious food for my family. I want to have a garden and a swing set in my backyard. I want to go to dance recitals and soccer games. I want to start and carry out traditions around the holidays with my family. I want to make chocolate chip cookies for my neighbors.. I want to marry the man of my dreams and explore the world together.. I want to do great things for the world.I want to travel everywhere!  I want to teach. I want to help other people be happy with themselves.I want to have confident, open minded children.  I want to learn more about this beautiful world around me. I want to grow closer to God. ...I want so many things and if Broadway and Hollywood  fit in, then that's great! but now the pressure is off... I'm still gonna be great. 
I promise. 
Love, yourself :)

3 comments:

  1. i have actually been thinking this exact same thing..

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  2. really? figures.. its a twin thing... oh wait. but im glad im not the only one :)

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  3. you took the words right out of my mouth! it must be the name thing. hah :) love you girl! miss you

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